One author I was reading had an excellent statement that she made about that - "I get nervous when people say they want to have a baby. I'd prefer it if people said they want to raise a child, because then they've at least considered the lifelong commitment involved." Too many people just have kids because they can, or they think they're supposed to. Then the kid doesn't turn out the way they want so they decide trying to torture and scare it into conformity is okay.